Just a RanT

I have been really slow in approving all the comments that wait for approval. Just so that you know for those of you that are new, your first comment needs approval, after that, it posts automatically. I don’t feel that I need to control every comment because it doesn’t make this a free thinking blog then. So far I have been lucky that in 5 years of keeping this blog I have only had 2 trolls or bad comments. I guess it’s because even the typing has energy.

Can you accept that everything is energy? Everything is energy/vibration/sound so even me typing this post right now is energy and  I believe that the not so happy readers don’t stay on this blog too long because they don’t feel comfortable with happy and joyous energy. Just my thoughts on that.

But back to approving your comments. It’s a one time thing and I’m finding it very difficult to come back and write on a regular basis. Some may ask  me why? I receive a lot of emails if I don’t post something in a few weeks. Some readers are almost petrified that I won’t be writing because they enjoy what I have to say and so at times I feel obligated that I need to write something.

After my partners death, it was much easier as I had an excuse, but as time went by, life changed drastically. For years I was living a schedule and so I gave up doing a lot of things because I can’t take my Camera and go into nature knowing I have one hour to photograph. Now, I can get on my Scooter, grab my gear and just ride until I find something to photograph. I don’t need to look at my watch knowing I have to come home to take care of my partner and the household, it’s amazing to feel so free. So, the blog was part of that escape at night when I could not go out anywhere but couldn’t leave the house because there was a time when my partner needed 24 hr care. The blog became my Journey, sharing my thoughts and experiences, I could sit at my computer all night if I wanted to and share.

scorpion2
This is a Scorpion about 1 cm in length, my first Macro shot. 

Now, I can sleep as long as I want and be outside as long as I want, so the blog kind of fell by the wayside. But, it’s important to me because you dear readers give me acknowledgement and I think that every writer seeks that.

Look, things are getting really crazy, it’s January and trees started growing new leaves in November, some are fruiting but also dying because it’s too cold. Nature is confused, and if nature is confused, then what is humanity?

Maybe nature isn’t confused. Maybe it’s just adjusting it’s biorhythms? Can Nature be confused? Isn’t Nature our guide? What do you think? I feel Nature’s confusion as I walk through it. I live in the middle of Nature, from my Sun-room I am surrounded by nature and as I sit there observing, I feel confusion. After all, why would an Almond tree blossom in November instead of March? Or does the Almond tree already know it has to change it’s cycle? If we are use Nature as a guide, then perhaps we should take heed that Winter is turning into Spring and Vice Verse; it means that we should adapt to Nature. How can nature be confused? Can the frequencies that are being emitted by those Cell Towers and all the other technology damage nature and thus it’s confused? These are questions I think about while I am out there walking because everything is different and I can’t figure out if it’s because Nature is confused or is Damaged. Whatever the answer may be, neither one is a good one. Confused or damaged doesn’t lead to anything good.

I met a new kitten today, a Feral cat that my girlfriend was feeding and while all the cats ran off, he came up to me and so he’s being delivered in the next few days as I was on my Scooter today and could not bring him home with me. He’s that Felix Cat on Purina Felix pouch foods but has a beautiful energy. This is what I got for thinking about using a Feral cat to test my negative manifesting!

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The Dark Side of Manifesting

Interesting subject isn’t it? You may ask, has Ines gone to the dark side? I’ve been gone, but only from the blog. I needed time out, many changes after my partner passed away and I wanted to share something with you, something that I feel is so important.
My partner and I worked out the financial part and Estate 7 months before he passed away. He has 2 children from previous marriage and they never accepted me as part of their dad’s life. They acted like teenagers, you know: ” Daddy left mummy for a younger woman and we don’t like daddy because mommy told us he didn’t love us anymore, and SHE did something to him to make him leave us”. That was the attitude they had and I wasn’t bothered by that but the reason we did the Estate is because even Toni knew his kids would come after me. He passed on July 18th and within hours they were calling to find out if their dad left a Will.
My point to the story is this: After we signed the Agreement, it was a way to protect me from his kids so that they could not take the house away from me and I knew that they would be upset, they expected that Toni would leave them everything and I should be out on the street. So, for months after signing this agreement, I was obsessed with: ” They are going to be really pissed off, I better not tell anyone in case they find out, Paul is going to come after me and he will do whatever it takes to destroy me, etc, etc.”
At the Estate Hearing on Nov. 14th, just as I was going to waive my rights to Ancestral Land that Toni owned, the lawyer butts in and says: ” We appeal, we are suing, and we have filed Criminal charges”. Yes, they accused me of denying him the proper medical care, denying him his prescribed medications, accused me of Quackery and thus causing his death.
I told you Ines, you see, you were right, you knew this was going to happen.
You may ask: ” Ines, how do you know you manifested this and it was just meant to be?” Because I have been manifesting for years now, uncontrolled, but I have been manifesting for 4 months, all I could think of was how they were going to come after me.
Before I continue, the Police Investigation was completed in a few days and all charges were dismissed, but the fact is they did try. I haven’t yet received the Official Paperwork, but I’ve been told to go home and enjoy life.

The power we hold is scary, you need to understand this. I have been writing about this for years, and yet I became a Victim of my own truth and what I preach and what I believe to be true.

It’s impossible to control every thought. We were not designed to exist in this kind of environment where we are living in this Matrix and Illusion, so we are constantly in a Stress Mode from making breakfast, tending to the sick, going to work, raising children, paying taxes, putting up with noisy neighbors, we simply don’t have the time to Meditate or to control our thoughts. Only Monks have that time while they are up in their Temples to Meditate, but then they don’t need to worry about raising kids, driving in traffic or putting up with noisy neighbors. You get my point.
It was in these past few months that I too had the time to think and contemplate, to learn how to monitor my thoughts and watch how and what I think because you know that saying: ” Be careful for what you wish for?” It is fucking true!
We are Creators, we manifest whether we know it or not, are aware of it or not, but we manifest our own reality. I love listening to Abraham Hicks, the information is wise and empowering because whatever that being teaches is what I already know. Thinking about it creates the idea, but focusing and meditating on it, brings forth the energy to manifest it and then you have this ” Good feeling” inside when you think about it. For the last 10 years, I have manifested everything I want and need. I live in abundance even when I didn’t have funds to pay the bills today, I felt rich and knew the money would arrive, it always does. I never think: ” My wallet is empty or I don’t have money”. I always think:” I have abundance and the Universe knows when I am ready for it”.
So, my thoughts led me to something dark. Is it possible that I manifested Toni’s death? When he was diagnosed with PAH in 2014, the automatic protocol along with other drugs were Diuretics. He was collecting fluids around the heart, the heart enlarges because it’s not getting enough oxygen from the Lungs and so the only way they knew was to give him Diuretics. It never solved the problem, but they kept increasing his dosages to the point where he was skin and bones. Even with him taking 2L of water everyday, it never stayed inside long enough, so this caused his blood to clot abnormally and for years I would tell Toni: ” These diuretics are going to kill you”. I believe they were the cause of his death as he came home from his checkup a week before he died. They found a clot behind his knee, but figured it was just one little clot and sent him home with Clexane injections to break it down. The Coroner said it was possible that the clot didn’t break down and travelled.
For years I have been thinking: ” These fucking diuretics are going to kill him”.
No, don’t get me wrong. I am not blaming myself for his death. Those of you that have been reading this blog for years know that I gave it everything I had to care for him lovingly, but it makes you wonder. Whether it’s knowing or unknowing, can we manifest such things? Can we manifest harm to someone else? I don’t have those answers. I know that I can manifest for me, but I’m not sure that I can’t manifest to others.
I know that we are powerful, I know that we are Creators, but most people will find excuses when life doesn’t go the way they want. The reality is that we did manifest the good and the bad, just by thinking it that way. When we constantly repeat in our minds: ” I have no money, I can’t pay the bills, how am I going to survive tomorrow, I wish I can find a job, I need to borrow some money”, the Universe just gives us more of what we are thinking about. I call that Poverty Consciousness. So, when we come sad because we didn’t get that job that we wanted; did you think about what you were thinking on your way there or the days before the Interview? How about this: ” I hope I get the job, I hope I can dress and impress, I need this job, what happens if I don’t get this job?” These are the common thoughts we think on our way to accomplish something. The self doubt, the worries, the insecurities all giving instructions to manifest what we are thinking.
Do be careful for what you want. I’m not talking about wishing or hoping for something. Those are passive thoughts and they don’t create anything. But if you focus on something and make it the center of your attention, that you want it so bad and believe that you will get it, you will get it when you are ready for it. Take it from me, I have been manifesting good and bad, but now I am learning to really be careful for what I want or think because I do believe that we influence other lives with our thoughts. I do believe that.
We are in the Terminal Madness, I have the luxury of listening to Fox News, RT News and Press TV all day long and the world is divided, we are on the cusp of a rebellion or revolution. Humanity knows that something is not right, and it knows that things have to change, but they haven’t yet figured out who they are. It all comes down to being aware of the power we hold and the power we are. We are so powerful it is frightening at times, intimidating and often I want to disbelieve this because our thoughts are constantly passing by, we are like a factory track of products moving along the line to be packaged.
You may ask how do I change this? It’s easy and it’s not easy. Like everything else we want to learn, we have to practise and dedicate some time for it. Instead of meditating which is usually about stopping your thoughts, focus on your thoughts, just observe them, follow the pattern of your thoughts and then start catching them: ” This wasn’t conducive to my existence, or this one doesn’t benefit me etc. You can have an empty mind, but what then? Why would anyone want an empty mind? We can’t manifest anything when we shut down the mind, we want to alter it’s reason for thinking. Think only thoughts that are: Positive, that are productive, that solve problems, that are proactive, thoughts of what you want, how to get what you want, basically, you are God and you get to Create whatever it is that you want. Having an empty mind is having an empty life. I want to live life in joy and have abundance. Isn’t that what everyone wants? No, I don’t want a good job and I don’t want to drive a nice car. I want joy and abundance.
You know, we have a H1N1 flu epidemic, I guess because we are a smoking society, this Virus affects the Lungs and many people even young people succumb to bed for at least 10 days to 2 weeks. It’s a nasty flu, and been around for a few years. Everyone is afraid to go out, the Pharmacist is wearing a mask. I decided that I don’t want that Virus and I have made it my #1 enemy. I have never had the Flu,   I do not want you in my body, please leave, you are not welcome”, So, my point is this: People are terrified and I smile, I don’t get the flu because I don’t want them critters in my body. Believing this will keep you safe, but the moment a self doubt enters your mind, you’re finished. There cannot be any self doubt, there has to be this knowing about what you believe. Like you are already living it, you see yourself that way. I know I’m rambling but I had a lot to say.
There is a dark side to Manifesting, I’m trying to figure that out now and see but I need to focus on something and make it turn bad, that’s the part I can’t decide. I thought about a feral cat outside and focusing my thoughts on it, but I can’t wish harm to anything, so this is going to be tough to experiment with and I believe it is without intent that we do this. We see it all the time, yelling at a child: ” Don’t walk there, you will fall, don’t touch that it will bite you”. Why do people fear dogs yet were never bitten by them? Because their parents probably scared the shit out of them as children and they cling to that belief. Thing is, they do get bitten as adults. Did the parents manifest or did they manifest by believing the dog will bite them?
Something to think about.