What is an Internet stalker?
At its mildest, a stalker is simply a troll that has attached itself to an individual. At worst, boring, at best, flattering. Find out about trolls. But a stalker can be a serious predator, using the Internet to pursue a real or imagined vendetta, or other perverted agenda. Risk assessment is an essential first step.
Start by thinking about who it is; is it someone you have simply upset on the Internet, someone with whom you’ve had a relationship? Is it someone you knew before, or have met in the real world?
Think about where you see it – newsgroups? forums? chat rooms? email?
What does it say? Is it a matter of direct insults? Is it lies and rumors? Does it reveal information not generally known that you want kept secret?
When – and how often – does it appear?
How is it threatening? Is it simply annoying, or do you fear direct contact, betrayal or what? Think about the worst it can do … how bad is that?
Why are you being stalked – is it simply spite and boredom, is it envy or resentment? Have you done anything that you think may have set it off?
Once you can answer these questions, you will have a clearer idea of what you are dealing with, and how quickly you may need to act.
- In virtually every case, the first line of defense is to do nothing; simply treat it as a troll and ignore it – most will go away fairly quickly. remember, these creatures are a form of troll; if they fail to get rapid feedback, their inclination is to move on- they usually have neither the stamina nor the intelligence for a difficult situation.
- But – however mild this stalker appears – always save every message you receive. A good way to do this is to create a new folder in your mailbox, and move all mails or copy newsgroup postings to that folder. I’d advise keeping this folder for at least a year after the last post, possibly longer. This can be a useful store of evidence, if later required, and can help in identifying the stalker.
- Consider your options. Retaliation will make you feel better, but can be risky; as it may inspire, provoke or enable the stalker to strike further. For example, using the stalker’s guestbook to warn them is risky if you have a guestbook that is open to attack. But if it is reasonably safe, then attack – let the stalker know that you are not afraid of electrons!
- By definition, a stalker is a coward, like all bullies, like all who attack from behind, or in the dark. Be sure to mention this in every attack.
- Stalkers make it personal – You make it impersonal. Minimize any private response you make; maximize every public response.
- Not invariably, but usually, stalkers are none too bright; as JR would say, “The Elevator Don’t Reach the Top Floor” – few intelligent people would go down the road to stalksville. Some, of course, are severely mentally ill. If you suspect that, then do not engage the stalker in any kind of dialog – just keep careful records and make appropriate reports.
- Be Reasonable – Your attacks should be in response to the stalker’s – and their first line of defense will be to accuse you of stalking – so don’t go over the top. You’ll usually be amazed how easy it is to attack a stalker, but exercise restraint. If they write in your forum, and it’s safe to respond – then write in theirs. But be honest, brief and to the point – even if you post in every thread.
- Keep records of all that you do, as well as what they do – and consider writing a web diary, or opening a web page to expose them. They may well have a reputation to lose – if they deserve to lose it, help them to lose it (example – The Zeppo).
- Share The Laughter – However unnerving a stalker may be, if you look at them coldly in the light of day, they are pretty ridiculous. Some are Nothing But Ridiculous (example – Spiro). Savor that; turn it around, let them – and the world – see how ridiculous they are. Every time you mock them, you gain, and they lose. Share The Laughter.
- Be consistent – once you have identified their weaknesses (besides being a loopy, cowardly piece of slime!), use the information against them, in every response.
- Be careful – one of the first defenses of a stalker is to claim that you stalked them, and any defense by you may be used against you as claimed cyberbullying.
The object of this page is to bring together a definitive document to cover the utter sadness of the Internet troll. Usually, a troll is nothing more than a passing nuisance, but, as this page will show, they can be a worry (stalkers). However, it is almost invariably an inadequate individual who can be safely ignored.
This page will define the activity, and help with early recognition; once acknowledged, trolls can take up residence, and, like athlete’s foot, can be difficult to shift. And when you’ve finished here, I recommend this fairly comprehensive guide to managing sad thirteen year olds loose on Mom’s computer.
The term derives from “trolling”, a style of fishing which involves trailing bait through a likely spot hoping for a bite. The troll posts a message, often in response to an honest question, that is intended to upset, disrupt or simply insult the group.
Usually, it will fail, as the troll rarely bothers to match the tone or style of the group, and usually its ignorance shows.
I believe that most trolls are sad people, living their lonely lives vicariously through those they see as strong and successful.
Disrupting a stable newsgroup gives the illusion of power, just as for a few, stalking a strong person allows them to think they are strong, too.
For trolls, any response is ‘recognition’; they are unable to distinguish between irritation and admiration; their ego grows directly in proportion to the response, regardless of the form or content of that response.
Trolls, rather surprisingly, dispute this, claiming that it’s a game or joke; this merely confirms the diagnosis; how sad do you have to be to find such mind-numbingly trivial time-wasting to be funny?
Remember that trolls are cowards; they’ll usually post just enough to get an argument going, then sit back and count the responses (Yes, that’s what they do!).
- No Imagination – Most are frighteningly obvious; sexist comments on nurses’ groups, blasphemy on religious groups .. I kid you not.
- Pedantic in the Extreme – Many trolls’ preparation is so thorough, that while they waste time, they appear so ludicrous from the start that they elicit sympathetic mail – the danger is that once the group takes sides, the damage is done.
- False Identity – Because they are cowards, trolls virtually never write over their own name, and often reveal their trolliness (and lack of imagination) in the chosen ID. As so many folk these days use false ID, this is not a strong indicator on its own!
- Cross-posting – Any post that is cross-posted to several groups should be viewed as suspicious, particularly if unrelated or of opposing perspective. Why would someone do that?
- Off-topic posting – Often genuine errors, but, if from an ‘outsider’ they deserve matter-of-fact response; if genuine, a brief apposite response is simply netiquette; if it’s a troll post, you have denied it its reward.
- Repetition of a question or statement is either a troll – or a pedant; either way, treatment as a troll is effective.
- Missing The Point – Trolls rarely answer a direct question – they cannot, if asked to justify their twaddle – so they develop a fine line in missing the point.
- Thick or Sad – Trolls are usually sad, lonely folk, with few social skills; they rarely make what most people would consider intelligent conversation. However, they frequently have an obsession with their IQ and feel the need to tell everyone. This is so frequent, that it is diagnostic! Somewhere on the web there must be an Intelligence Test for Trolls – rigged to always say “above 150”
Wherever they are tolerated – this means forums and networking sites that have loose or lazy moderation, and places like Usenet (newsgroups) where there may be no moderation at all.
Where trolls are successful is a slightly different issue – some forums allow members to set an ‘ignore’ function, so they just do not see troll posts, after the first one, and some specialist forums are tightly focused so that troll posts stick out a mile and are ignored – it’s larger, more general forums that have issues, as it only takes a couple of members to be drawn in for the whole forum to suffer. They also thrive on ‘opinion’ sites, such as politics and religion, where feelings often run high anyway. But, again, only if moderation is weak.
Usenet has a special problem, as moderation is impossible; for trolls to be controlled, requires committed members using their kill-files effectively, and avoiding accidental cross-posting – which is all too easy with many newsreading software setups.
Some career trolls have set up their forums to exchange notes. These rarely thrive, as most trolls are not team players, and they simply fight among themselves. in other cases, they become centers for cyberbullying (see stalking); while that’s a sad development, it makes it easier to have the sites closed.
Any newsgroup, bulletin board, forum or chat room can attract trolls, but they don’t have the brains to attack nuclear physicists, and they are drawn to the quick response where sex, religion and race are found; so politics is easy prey.
One troll famously tried to infiltrate a mensa group; the results read like 100 trolls and one regular, it didn’t have a chance – but it was stupid enough to persist until removed.
Usually, no, though fractured funny bones and occasional waves of nausea have been reported.
When a troll become persistent and personal, you may need to consider the possibility that it has fermented into an Internet Stalker – equally pathetic, if not more so – but sometimes requiring weedkiller.