As I sit here reading Michelle Walling’s posts, I realized that my moment was just blank. What does that mean? It means that I’m not fretting about the weather, wondering if I have clients tomorrow, not looking at the watch to see if it’s bedtime yet, not thinking about what I need to take out of freezer for our meals tomorrow. The entire day was spent just daydreaming about all the abundance that has come my way in the last few months.
I sit here, trying to explain the stage/phase I am at in life. This life. This reality. One that started out with so much violence, abuse, rigid parents, moving every couple of years, being sexually assaulted, dying while giving birth to my son 37 years ago, marrying another abusive man…the list goes on. The traumatic experiences in the first 30 years of my life are enough to send someone to a looney bin or drive them to drugs and alcohol. At least that’s what the statistics show.
I’m sitting here, just being. Each time I want something it manifests. Two weeks ago I wanted to buy some things for myself and within days a group of clients show up at my door needing help and money just kept coming in. This happens to me everyday. A packet arrived this morning that I ordered shoes for my partner and myself, a package of leggings and some items for making creams. My wallet is never empty. I stopped watering a batch of tomatoes a week ago, with temperatures over 36C for the last 10 days, these tomatoes refuse to die and I’m still picking them.
Nothing seems to end, money keeps flowing in, I’m in constant gratitude for all the things I’m spending money on this year. I know that I talk about having a great life and it’s always filled with abundance. Now I’m literally manifesting everything. The difference is that I don’t think about the outcome. Will I make it or not? Will it come in time? Will I have enough to pay for it? I don’t think about it that way anymore. I just KNOW that Universe will provide and it does.
Then the mind does a trick on me: “Am I really here?” “Do I really exist?” “Am I a figment of my imagination?” “Isn’t life supposed to be difficult?”. The answer: I don’t care, it matters not. I am where I am, I am what I am. The past or future are just illusions we imagine but are not real. I am here in this moment and almost afraid to wish for anything because I’m afraid that I might become materialistic. Who me? Heck no. How do you stop money from coming? “Money, please don’t come, I don’t need it”.
I know life is tough for many people. I look at what is going on in the USA right now and I don’t know whether I should laugh or cry. I can’t decide if it’s funny or sad, comical or pathetic. Maybe I am not in their reality anymore. Can someone please knock on my door so I can be sure that we’re sharing the same reality?
You may think I’m nuts. No. I’m sharing every thought that is coming through. There is no fear, no apprehension, no worry, no cares, no negativity about anything, I am simply sitting here and trying to put in words how great this new reality is. What happened? What changed? What was the magic word or thought that brought me here? I don’t know.
The next step is to now look for new challenges. I think I’m going to go back to Photography and start recording the beauty of this island. I already have many postcards that I made years ago. Here are a few:
My ancestors moved to the island and lived in the tower of this palace. They were servants to the Italian Marchi-Martini Family, that was in 1776.
You see, I can do anything I set my mind to do. I have never thought “I can’t”. I have never NOT accomplished what I set out to do. Isn’t that godlike? Isn’t that like Creator?
My daughter Gina and I last year when she came to visit from Vancouver. She's 38 years old. Wow. I still feel like I'm 38. Time stopped.
If we talk about talents, I can’t list them all. It’s not about how much I know and can do, it’s about doing it with heart. I never do anything unless I feel it and enjoy doing it. I hate cleaning house so I hire a housekeeper. While she cleans, I cook gourmet meals. Life is fantastic, this reality is complete, I’m ready to move on.
What about you? Do you have something to be proud of? Have you helped at least 100 people in this lifetime? Can you wake up in the morning not even knowing what date it is because you’re not slaving for anyone? Do you cook when you’re hungry? Can you take your partner by the hand and say: “I’m in the mood, can I take you with me?” What is life if you’re forced to live it by a schedule or because you have obligations, loans to pay back, maxed out credit cards? Instead of putting money away you went out and bought the latest smart phone, right? Do you know how much money you can save simply by not buying your morning coffee? A penny day for 25 years is million dollars. Did you know that?
So, if you had to rate your life right now would you say you’re doing everything you want to do? Do you have enough of everything? Do you check prices when shopping for food? Do you grow your own food? If you die today, will you leave a legacy behind? Do you even know why you are here?
I know why I’m here. I’m here to manifest and be an example to others. It’s one thing to just talk about it, another to live it. Are you living your life to your full potential? Can you walk away from everything and start over?
Screw the little things, they get us into trouble, clutter our minds for bigger thing and disable us from creating. True, life is what you make it. But what kind of life do you want and or do you even know? Can you survive 3 months without a paycheck?
If you never hear from me again, just know this: Typing on this laptop and sharing my stories got really boring. If I left this reality, you can be assured I did it with joy and knowing the other side was waiting. When I cross over, I’m heading straight home and asking Creator to give me an A in manifesting!